But What If...

     1800 people are gathering in Denver, Colorado for the Festival of Homiletics, a preaching conference for pastor geeks like me. At the opening worship service, I was introduced to a Lutheran, blue grass, 19 page bulletin liturgical style of worship. With clergy collars, banjo, gluten free crackers, and standing up/sitting down more times than a fitness class, pastors (among others) gathered to praise God together. 

The opening worship service was head lined by Rev. Nadia Bolz-Weber, a local celebrity known for her tattoos, tell-it-like-it-is preaching style, and New York Times best selling memoir. Even in a ten minute sermon, she did not disappoint. Using the Mark 9:30-37 passage about welcoming children, she put the passage in context by reminding us the role of children in that day. And let's just say it had nothing to do with Norman Rockwell and Ann Geddes. Children were seen as replacement adults: dirty, inconvenient, unwanted, snot nosed, not potty trained, and treated more like mongrel dogs. The disciples were arguing about who was the greatest, "like a bunch of insecure junior high boys talking smack." Jesus responds to these petty arguments by taking this dirty, messy, unwanted child and telling them they need to welcome this child as they welcome Jesus.

Bolz-Weber continued, "This could have been a lesson on radical hospitality, whatever the hell that means." But upon reflecting that a bunch of tired stressed preachers who have travelled all day were the ones listening, the message that Jesus was giving us one more thing to do just didn't seem right. But what if... What if instead of seeing ourselves as the disciples, we saw ourselves as the child: feeling misunderstood, unwanted, messy, inadequate. What if we are the dirty ones that never feel good enough.  What if the disciples were not only given the message to welcome the child, but to see themselves as a child welcomed by God. What if we as pastors saw ourselves the same way.

Pastors too feel small, scared, with no ability to make themselves worthy, like the children of Jesus' day. But what if...God welcomes that part of us just as much as the competent, faithful part of ourselves. What if we didn't have to hide our pettiness, our insecurities, our short comings, our messiness, because we knew we were accepted, welcomed, and loved by a God who enfolds that which is filthy and helpless into God's forgiveness and grace.

Then pastors could be honest and vulnerable, standing among the congregation instead of above them. Then preaching could be just as much Good News to the preacher as the congregation. Then we might step out from the curtain of competence that hides our insecurities. Then we might really experience words like grace, unconditional love, surrender.

What if we were all just dirty, unwanted, messy, inadequate children. And what if God welcomes and loves us anyway. 

Read It Again, Mommy!

     I continue to be amazed at how my young children can listen to stories over and over and over again.  Just as soon as the last page is read, I invariably hear, "Read it again, Mommy!"  The same goes for videos or CDs in the car.  How can children hear the same thing so many times?  Don't they already know the characters, the plot, and how it all ends?  In fact, my 4 year old is starting to recite various lines from movies, books, and songs because he knows them so well.  What is this fascination with listening to the same story over and over again?  Maybe it's the way human beings learn, even absorb stories and lessons and truth.  It starts to shape us, our thinking, our behavior, our speech. 

     Perhaps that is the reason for the rhythm of the church calendar.  After all it's the same stories over and over and over again, Advent, Christmas, Epiphany, Ash Wednesday, Lent, Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, Easter, Pentecost.  The same stories in scripture such as the Good Samaritan, the Widow offering her two last coins at the temple, the Woman at the Well, Jesus with the Children, the Greatest Commandments, salt and light and sheep and goats.  Attending church on a regular basis, we will hear all these stories multiple times.  Maybe it's the way Christians learn, even absorb the stories and lessons and Truth that God has to teach us.  And it starts to shape us, our thinking, our behavior, our speech.
     As you hear the Christmas story once again this weekend, ask God to "Read it again!"  It's not that we don't know the story.  But maybe it's that we need to allow that story to re-create us, shape our thinking, our behavior, our speech.  Maybe we need to absorb that story, even memorize some of its lines, so that it becomes a part of us each and every day of the year.  God's love became flesh and lived among us.  May you know God's love, living among you, this Christmas season.

And a Little Child Shall Lead Them

    If there ever was a time of year when children lead us adults in joy, wonder, and imagination, it's Christmas time.  Seeing through the eyes of a child, we experience the magic of Christmas once again.  Remember when the days leading up to Christmas seemed to last forever?  Remember when the possibilities seemed endless when you filled out your Christmas list?  Remember when you woke up WAY before dawn to rush into the living room where presents were stacked around the Christmas tree?  There was no such thing as stress or pressure during this time.  Only excitement and happiness and wonder.  Don't you wish you could recapture some of that childlike excitment this time of year?
    I'm fortunate to experience Christmas with a 4 and 2 year old this year.  I love watching their eyes dance when we open our advent calendars and light candles.  I love witnessing their excitement as they pick toys for other children listed on the angel tree.  I love watching them become animated as we anticipate lighting the advent wreath in church this Sunday, or the coming of grandma and grandpoo, or reiterating the one or two things they really want for Christmas.
    My children have helped me to dream and imagine once again.  If the possibilities are endless, what do I want for Christmas?  Peace, hope, wisdom, joy.  That's at least a good start.  And why not?  Are these not gifts that come from God for those who ask, seek, and knock? 
    After all, who is putting all that adult stress and pressure and expectation on me, anyway?  So maybe this year I'm going to be a little less adultlike, and a little more childlike.  Maybe I'll wonder a little more, allow the excitement to seep into my bones,  and awaken my imagination to the endless possibilities that Christmas brings.  And my little children shall lead me.